Saying sorry isn’t always easy, so here are some tips:
1. Be quick. Be intense.
The other day when I wasn’t listening to a workmate and I embarrassed myself by saying, ‘that’s good’ when she’d said her dog had died. Had I left an apology longer than the moment I realised I’d made a mistake then there would’ve been room for resentment to ensue. Be aware. Take note. Be quick. Be intense and mean it.
2. Say it cause you mean it
I got why my workmate had the shits. Luckily she knew that I wasn’t usually dismissive and knew I meant my apology. A person wants to know you get why it’s an issue. Always try to reflect on their point of view.
3. Be genuine.
After you say sorry try asking some questions about why they feel the way they feel and what would make them feel better. This is called genuine interest in someone’s hurt feelings. This is how we learn to change and grow.
4. Be accountable.
Take full responsibility for hurting someone else’s feelings, and explain what you might do differently to avoid doing the same thing in the future.
5. Be more than enough
Sometimes, sorry isn’t enough. Work on truly understanding why someone feels hurt and try to change any hurtful patterns. This is especially helpful in a team, a family gathering or in a partnership.