There’s lots of advice out there about how to say ‘no’. This is especially good if you want to set boundaries in your life. I spent much of my life holding back and 5 ways to say ‘yes’ is for those people who habitually turn down invites or new opportunities.
Want more excitement in your life?
1. Too late to hesitate
You’re safe. You don’t need to weigh up the pros and cons. No time to hesitate. Once I was asked to go to the Eiffel Tower bar/restaurant for a free drink. I was on automatic and said ‘no’. To be honest I wasn’t sure how to get back to my hotel before midnight. I’ll always think of that moment and want a different outcome. Experience is better than fear. Don’t hesitate – participate!
2. Feel the fear
Susan Jefferies had a point when she wrote Feel the fear and do it anyway. We have a moment where we can acknowledge the fear that makes us – say ‘no’ – feel it – let it go. Accept the invitation and even better, turn up on your own. The other day I went to choir on my own and right after I met the guy sitting beside me and we shared a choir sheet, I thought, ‘Why haven’t I done this sooner? Say ‘yes’ – you deserve it.
3. Limit less and feel good more
I watched a documentary the other day that asked fifteen-year-old boys, ‘Who set the rules out of how you become a man?’ No one could be sure. We set limits on ourselves to fit in and to mostly please others. We talk ourselves out of our dreams and desires. Saying a genuine ‘yes’ in our lives comes down to trust. Trust yourself to imagine what you want. Eventually you will start actually manifest what you want (but be careful what you wish for – you might just get it).
4. Play a positive note
The alternative to saying ‘yes’ is to say ‘no’ when we mean ‘yes’. Or even worse we say, ‘I don’t know’, when we always know the answer is ‘YES’. When we’re so used to not knowing or getting what we want we expect to turn down everything. It’s time for you to turn this around. Try it with me…’YES, I want that’, ‘YES, I can do that’, ‘YES, I want more pleasure, more prosperity, more money, more meaning.’ ‘YES’ is a life affirming statement – keep a positive mindset and you have a positive life.
5. Expand, explore, create and live
Explore and create the life you desire. I noticed that what started as determination for my goals had fallen to the other side of the spectrum and become stubbornness. So instead of accepting invitations (that meant I would network more as a writer) I started turning them down (because I HAD TO stay home and write). My world got very insular and limited. I realised I can only expand my experience by exploring, creating and imagining possibilities by saying ‘yes’. Now, I make time every day to create something, even if it’s a pile of flavours in a pan or an outfit. Just like my sister says at opportune moments like diving into the surf at sunrise – ‘YES, this is living!’
Is it time for you to start saying yes to life? YES!*
*It’s totally fine if your answer is no – just make sure that when you say no, you’re really saying yes to creating more space in your life for what you truly desire.